Coffee

I don't know if I've blogged about it, but if I have you'll (meaning emily most likely who reads my blog) will have to deal with it again.

I really want to like coffee. A lot actually. I see pictures of piping hot coffee with little bubbles on top because it's just been poured in the really awesome looking mug and i want to drink it. Not because it looks good or because I know it tastes delicious (because i think it tastes nasty and therefore looks nasty) but because when i think of coffee I think of really awesome things. Things like sitting in a coffee shop getting to know someone and you've got your hand held firm to this wonderful cup of coffee. Or sitting on a couch in front of a warm fire place, with a blanket wrapped around you, your best friend next to you and your talking about life with two hands grasping one mug and sipping ever so carefully. Or.... reading a wonderful book sipping coffee.

There's so many things that could be going on with cup of coffee. And when I say coffee i don't mean a coffee drenched in white mocha or wonderfully sugary flavors, but a plain black cup of coffee. And I miss all those moments and have to settle with a cup of tea, or a wonderfully sugary coffee. And it's just not the same. It's a completely different effect.

As for now, I don't think i'll ever like coffee. It would take a major life changing moment, like drink coffee or die.

All things New

God takes us through seasons in our life. Good things and bad. Regardless the outcome, we always get a fresh start. Soon, I will have to really buckle down and find a new job. Soon, my soul mate will be gone and living in california. Soon, I will be done with school. Soon, I will be living at my parents house again.

Every comfort that I may or may not really have is about to be shattered to pieces with only bits of old hanging on. I'm excited. Truly. A new job opportunity means I'll have money to make it to school when i have to start driving (so not looking forward to that). It also means I'll get to meet new people. Expand my horizons a little. I'm looking forward to wherever He places me.
Emily leaving is bittersweet for me. I'm so excited for her new start in California. i know it will be hard, but it will be so fun at the same time. Sometimes I long for a new start like she is getting the opportunity to do. I'm not exactly sure how my days will look like with out her in them. I suppose they'd look like they did when I didn't call her my soul mate but just some chick i thought was way too good and much too in love with Jesus to be seen with the likes of me. I like these days much better so I'd rather not go back. I will have exciting times in California with her now :) There's so much that could happen and I'm so very excited.
Being done with school is a joy that needs a whole blog all to it's own. Let's just say I'm really really excited for that and super anxious to find out where I end up!
Moving back home is very nerve racking to me. I have no idea what will happen or come of that. I truly have to trust that God will do what He needs to do and I pray He leads me every step of the way.

I'm ready for new things. I embrace them with open arms.

Onething'09

God is so very good. All the way before time. He always has been. Rob, Andrew, and I drove down in my Grandpa's sweet Honda. And that alone is a story in itself. But God is so very good.

We got there Tuesday and stayed until Thursday. Pretty much the world is ending and we need to love Jesus as much as we can in the same way He loves us. Really though, God is doing something amazing in the hearts of believers. Something more than what we have experienced before. His Spirit will be manifested in ways that most people believed does not happen anymore. I watched it first hand among the thousands of people at onething.

Worship was awesome. We worshiped for over an hour each time and about 4 songs in that whole time. Legitimately.

Words cannot describe how amazing it was. I wish more people experienced it with us. I would not have changed a thing about it.

Rend

I've been having a hard time reading the Bible lately without looking words up. It's actually quite annoying because i don't have a dictionary and always have to do it on my phone. So, I need a dictionary.

But really, I don't know how I read the Bible before. All the words I look up are common words, that when read in context are easily figured out, but when you find the meaning it changes everything. (at least for me it does) I'll show you:

We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christs behalf: Be reconciled to God. 2 corinthians 5:20

ambassadors: a diplomatic official of the highest rank appointed and accredited as representative in residence by one government or sovereign to another, usually for a specific length of time
: a diplomatic official heading his or her country's permanent mission.
Appeal: an earnest or urgent request, entreaty or supplication
Implore: to appeal to in supplication; beseech to beg for urgently; entreat
Reconcile: to reestablish a close relationship between.

So we look at it differently
We are therefore Christ's diplomatic official heading our permanent mission, as though God were making his urgent request through us. We beg you urgently on Christ's behalf: Reestablish a close relationship with God.

It just makes it more real to me.
Today i was reading joel. I came across the passage that says, "Rend your heart and not your garments. Return to the Lord your God, for he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love, and he relents from sending calamity."

I looked up Rend and found a meaning i wasn't expecting .... to tear or split apart or into pieces violently. And i thought to myself that God is constantly asking us to do that. To tear our hearts apart. I think sometimes our hearts get very cold and hard. When we voluntarily open our hearts to God, we have no choice but to let our hearts be torn apart, because that is exactly what He does when we let him... He is a jealous God. He wants all of our hearts, not pieces.

Onething09

It only feels right to blog about it...

So we are suppose to be at onething09 right now. I can't explain to you how I feel about it. It's sad, but it somehow feels right. I truly believe if God wanted us there, he would let us be there. But he really hasn't opened doors and I have to believe that is for a reason. I was looking at the schedule today and realized, we could still leave today because we'd still get a full day tuesday, wednesday, and thursday. And inside, my heart aches because I know it will be big. I got an email today from them telling me that Loren someone is coming last minute because he felt led to speak. He was with youth with a mission and My heart ached a little more. But like I said, it feels right in some sick and twisted way.

I'm intrigued by how spirit led ihop is. I really am. I haven't really seen this in such a big organization before and I want to be a part of it. Big time.

Emily the Weaseler.

First of all, I'm blogging 8 blogs because for some reason 8 came out of my mouth and I aspire to a better blogger than emily and she said that I had to do 8 because 8 came out of my mouth. And i told her not to hold me accountable to anything that I ever say, but she is.

Second of all, my blog's title was simply suppose to be Emily, but for some reason Emily the Weaseler came up highlighted and then it just stayed there. So I'm going to look up Weaseler and make sure its not bad and it might not even be a word... It's not a word, so it stays.

Emily is leaving me to live with her soon to be husband Jonathon Ketchum. And her new name will be Emily Renee Ketchum, which I think sounds good. She's not only leaving me, but she's moving all the way to California. So, two (maybe 3) good things come out of this. 1) I get a new friend because I'll no longer be friends with Emily Bickel but I will now be friends with Emily Ketchum. I just hope I like her as much as Emily Bickel. Only time will tell. 2) I get to hang out in California all the time. 3) Im deciding that there's more than 3 possible good things. 4) I will no longer have to deal with having no matching socks, but jon will :) sorry jon. 5) I'll get to hang out with a Little Jon or Little Emily when they decide to have babies in less than 8 years. 6) When Jon becomes more of a rockstar and I save up my money like I said I would, we'll get to go shopping in california, which I've never done before. 7)I'll actually get to hang out with zechariah because Emily won't be there to hog him.

So, I'm sure there are more than 7 amazing things that will happen when emily moves away. I'll keep you posted. But really, she's the most amazing friend I've ever had and I'll miss her dearly but Jon will be much more blessed than I to married to here soon! :)

belong

My entire life i feel like i've gone in and out of stages of belonging. Right now, i feel like i'm on the outside.

I think a vital part to being a Christian is belonging to a group of Christians and feeling at home (church). It's been very hard lately because i've been searching for a new Church to attend. Its rough going from church to church. It's almost tiring and the complete opposite of what Church should be. :/

So that's my life now and I don't feel like I can share more right now. Sorry :)